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Home > Programs > Special Topics

Special Topics

Overview

The Special Topics page is used to post information that supplements our program books, which are the core of a CFM group meeting. This supplemental material includes:

  • Special Meetings
  • Special Services
  • Special Information
  • CFM Group Actions

All of the files on this page are small (under 100kb) unless noted, so should be fast to download.

RTF files are readable and printable by most word processors.

PDF files require Acrobat. Click on the icon to download a free copy of Adobe Acrobat Reader.

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Special Meetings

To introduce you to CFM, we have special topic meetings for you to view or download:

  1. Human Cloning

  2. Christian Response to Violence

  3. Reflection on 9/11/2001

  4. Habits of Prayer (written to include children)

  5. Baptism Preparation

  6. Nature of Marriage and Non-marital Unions

    This meeting was mentioned in Feb. 2004 ACT.

  7. Justice for Immigrants

  8. Live Without Fear (Chapter 10 of Intentional Christian Families)

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Special Services

  1. Special Prayer Service to commemorate those in our families who have died. Originally used on All Souls Day, 2001:

  2. Special Blessing to commemorate the Feast of the Holy Family:

  3. Lenten Reflection to share at a CFM meeting:

  4. Advent weekly family prayers and Advent Wreath prayers:

  5. Advent prayer service:

  6. Peace prayer service:

  7. Faith in the home prayer service:

  8. Doers of the Word prayer service:

  9. People of Promise prayer service:

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Special Information

  1. Special Family Vocations Flyer from NACFLM:

  2. Special Family Intimacy Flyer from NACFLM:

  3. Special Using the Media Flyer from NACFLM:

  4. Special Celebrate Success in the Family Flyer from NACFLM:

  5. Family Rituals Flyer from NACFLM:

  6. Links mentioned in Fr. Conroy's article in the February 2004 ACT.

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Group Actions

Posted here are CFM Group Actions that various groups have done that you too may find of interest and want to try. We currently have three categories of actions; click on them to see the list:

Please send the CFM USA Office information about your group's actions.

The CFM Office has compiled a list of actions for CFM groups and activities for groups of families and individual families to consider:

  • Click here to view a PDF file. This requires Adobe Acrobat.
  • Click here to download a "rtf format file", which is readable and printable by most word processors.

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Family Actions

  1. Lent at Home Family Actions:

  2. Special Family Night Actions:

  3. Actions to Challenge Materialism

  4. Teaching our Children Values Prayer

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Lessons in Leadership

Below are some thoughts to consider when leading a CFM group meeting, courtesy of Robin Hafey, former CFM Board member:

For better meetings

  • In some groups, all the couples in a CFM group are asked to take a turn leading a meeting during the year. Leadership is SHARED, so we each get the chance to hone our "leadership skills". For starters, when it's your turn to lead, you might try giving the people in your group a call to encourage them to check out the "observes" before they come to the meeting. All of us are on the "fast track" and it's so easy to forget the prep before coming… a friendly reminder can help!

  • People will visit as they arrive and it will be your call to get the meeting going. Make every effort to start on time. We've been in groups that have asked people to come 15 minutes before starting time so they have a chance to visit before digging into the meeting… When you begin on time, you respect the others, who may have sitters or need to get up early for work, etc.

  • Sometimes couples have problems getting a sitter lined up for their children. One idea to try, is to ask your regular sitter if she wants an "ongoing" sitting job. Line her up for every other Fri. (or Sat.) night for the whole year ahead! Give her a reminder call on your CFM week.

  • Some couples pair up and hire 1 sitter for 2 families, getting the children together for the evening as well! CFM friends can grow into "family".

  • CFM uses OPEN SHARING for discussion… which means, leave the response open to the group. If the facilitator asks a specific person their opinion, that person can "pass" if they prefer not to share at this time.

  • Try to stick to the questions suggested in your book. If a really good side discussion happens, encourage people to continue it during the social time at the end of the meeting.

  • Be aware of the time and "keep it rolling" in order to progress from OBSERVES to JUDGES to ACTS… the entire sequence is the CFM meeting. If you're spending more time on one question, call a "time out" to get on track or skip a question or two to keep things moving. An hour and a half is ample time for the meeting...leaving about half an hour for socializing at the end.

  • Don't be afraid of silence!!! Often people need time to organize their thoughts before they respond. Leave time for that to happen. This is especially helpful for people who are more reserved. Their input is an important part of our meeting!

Kids are part of the plan

  • Get your kids involved in getting ready for the meeting! Have them help you set up the chairs & get the table ready for dessert. Have them answer the door and welcome people as they arrive! They can take their coats for them and show them where the meeting will be. It's a wonderful opportunity for them to learn about hospitality and to get to know the folks in your group!

Hosting Tips

  • CFM suggests that you "keep it simple"! When you're having the meeting at your place, provide coffee, tea, water, pop and a dessert for the group. It gives you a chance to keep the meeting the central focus… not the food & drink. Most folks lives are busy and this suggestion helps provide something without getting carried away. Some families, depending on their financial situation, can feel intimidated if there's too much "fuss". (Note that if you decide to serve alcohol be conscious that it can affect the sharing and it's easier for a meeting to become more focused on "social" instead of faith & family.)

  • Set the mood for the meeting! …think music, lighting, a possible prayer to start things off. (the book has suggestions, but you might have another idea)

  • If it's your turn to lead the meeting, read through the lesson beforehand. Assemble any materials that you may need (extra paper, pens, props for role play, candle, music, etc.). Do the observes listed in preparation. A few days before the meeting give the couples in your group a phone call to remind them of the meeting at your place. Let them know you're excited to have them over!

  • Click here for an insert to print out and glue on the inside front cover of the CFM book listing "groundrules"/helpful hints for hosting meetings.

Group Ground Rules

  • As a member of CFM, it is common courtesy to let the hosting family know, if for some reason, you're not able to make the meeting. Take a minute to make the phone call. Let the host couple know if you have any special prayer requests so your group can lift you up! After all, we are FAMILY!!

  • Studies have shown that successful groups have their best chance of connecting when there are 10-14 members in the group. (5-7 couples,) In a larger group often the quieter people never have the chance to be heard. It's important to challenge your couples to make a commitment to CFM and to be there for the meetings! They will reap the benefits of building relationships with other caring adults who reinforce their value system and provide a network of support for their family! Community grows if people "invest" themselves!

  • It's very helpful to place the new couples with experienced CFMers their first year. This gives them a chance to get comfortable with the experience. Some groups have all the new couples together at the start of the year. By adding 2 experienced couples, they will be encouraged to share and learn the ropes of the observe, judge & act method. These mentor couples are, in essence, sharing the Good News of CFM and helping to grow the gift in their Parish!

  • At the start of each new year it's very helpful to take a vote on what night or afternoon will be best for the couples to meet. Make up a roster with names, addresses, phone numbers (cell numbers), e-mail addresses… children's names & ages… even birthdays and anniversary dates if you like! All this information gives the rest of the group a chance to get connected with one another! It can be added that the list is only for CFM purposes and not for distribution or selling.

Growing in Prayer

  • Sometimes, as Catholics, we can be uncomfortable sharing a need for prayer out loud. I attribute this to "old school" ideas, that my relationship with God is a "private" thing. If you take the risk to speak your needs, the community has a chance to respond and be present to you. When we ask for prayer it also gives the people in our group the heads up to continue to pray for us between meetings. God connects our hearts as we become a community.

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Ways to Grow a CFM Group

Below are some ways to grow CFM, courtesy of Tom and Mary Kay Halpin, CFM Board members:

As a parish CFM leader, we ask you to help spread the word about CFM to others in your parish. You know the value and blessings that CFM has brought to you and your family. Here are some suggestions for sharing CFM with others. We know that many people need to hear the same message multiple times before they decide to act on it, so don’t be frustrated if people don’t seem to respond initially. You are planting seeds… sooner or later they will grow!

Adding New Members

  1. PRAY that the Holy Spirit will guide you and will open the hearts of couples to hear the message of CFM.
  2. Meet with someone or multiple people on the parish staff (pastor, director of religious education, pastoral minister) to tell them about CFM. They will be able to refer others to CFM and help you build groups.
  3. According to the 2006 member survey, Personal Invitation is the best method to use in adding new members. Face-to-face or phone calls work best.
    • Ask current CFM couples to each think of a few people you could invite to join a group. Ask the couples to contact the people or ask them to give you the names and numbers and you can contact them. Call these people.
    • Every time you are at Mass or at a church/school function, look around and notice people...would they like CFM? Keep a running list of these names over the year. Start calling them when you are ready to start a group.
    • Ask you parish staff to help identify people who would be interested in CFM. For example, these groups:
      • Recent RCIA “graduates” – ask if you could speak about CFM at one of their meetings after Easter.
      • Baptism Class participants – ask if you could speak about CFM at their meeting.
      • New parishioners – attend New Parishioner Orientation or ask parish for names and numbers of new parishioners.
      • Moms group members – ask if you could speak at one of their meetings.
      • Marriage Preparation Classes – ask the program facilitators to share information about CFM with the engaged couples.
      • Vacation Bible School volunteers
      • Religious Education volunteers
      • Bible Study members
  4. Bulletin Announcements: You may not receive a lot of calls strictly from bulletin announcements but you will build name recognition in the parish. Also, it gives everyone in the parish the opportunity to join CFM.
  5. Witnessing from the Pulpit: Your pastor may allow you or other current CFM members to share your experience of CFM before the end of Mass.
  6. Ministry Sign-Up Fair: Use this as another opportunity to share your excitement for CFM. Create a fun sign for your table. Show the DVD, if possible. Provide information sheets and have a sign-up sheet.
  7. Kick-Off Party: invite current and new members (include information about the party in the bulletin announcements) to gather for socialization. Take this opportunity to have current members fill out registration forms for the coming year.

In many cases, it works best to have all of these activities occur within a 4-6 week period of time. Then people “see” the CFM name and hear the message multiple times in a short time period.

Ongoing care of new members:

Sometimes groups don’t always “gel” during the first year. The parish leader may want to stay in contact with new members to help them stay excited about CFM and the benefits it will bring to their families.

  1. PRAY for the success of the CFM groups in your parish and around the world.
  2. Invite a current CFM couple to “mentor” the new group for the first year. This includes attending the new group’s meetings as well as their own group’s meetings. This enables the new members to ask questions and get answers immediately. The mentor may also want to help the leader of the new group with getting meetings scheduled each month.
  3. The parish leader may want to call each of the new CFM members midway through the year to make sure they are enjoying their CFM experience. Is it what they expected? Are they having any problems in attending meetings (babysitting issues, scheduling conflicts)? The parish leader should try to address any concerns that arise.
  4. Talk to the CFM group leaders toward the end of the CFM year to get a sense of any members that may not join again the following year. Try to resolve any problems that may be keeping these couples from staying in CFM (babysitting issues, etc.).

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